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Heffalumps and woozles

Postcards from the eve of destruction

Donald Trump is missing a golden opportunity by not marketing Trump-branded grape “Kool-Aid.”

Doug, don’t forget to ban human sacrifice, cannibalism, and mating with aliens from elementary schools. Plus whatever other heffalumps and woozles dance in your freaky head.

“That lap dance I got in third grade really changed my life.” — Jeff Tiedrich

“The giveaway is the penultimate word.” — Rick Wilson

It’s in your lower right molar, Mike.

Where exactly does she teach economics? Weekend workshops at the Airport Ramada?

I’m flogging a dead horse.

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