Digby's Hullabaloo Posts

Why He Won

As one would expect, James Wolcott’s thoughts on the debate are great and he brings up something that I think may be the most important aspect of Edwards’s performance.

Like Bush last week, Cheney only fed the beast of the Republican “base.” He did nothing, less than nothing, to reach out to undecideds or swing voters or anyone who wasn’t already committed to the ticket. Edwards did. That’s why, despite some moments of shakiness and repetition and phony tough-guyism, Edwards won.

I listened to a few minutes of the debate on the radio live and then saw the whole thing later. One of the things that struck me in both instances was that Edwards consciously spoke to individual American’s everyday, real life concerns. Those things may not be particularly important at this point to the base of either party, but I think it may be very important to undecided voters.

You have to ask yourself why a voter is undecided at this point. If it were a matter of abstract political philosophy or “gut” feelings about character, there would be nothing to decide. The contrast between these two tickets is stark. What I think may be driving these undecideds is that they are looking for someone to speak to their personal concerns, show that they understand the way life is lived in America — to translate policy into real life solutions that they can wrap their arms around.

John Edwards is the only guy in the race with an easy, natural gift for speaking to that and I think he may have succeeded in bringing some of those people into the fold.

Wolcott also had the misfortune of seeing Dennis Miller embarrass himself on Jay Leno last night.

Afterwards, I watched Jay Leno, whose first guest was Dennis Miller, whose soul has sprouted tumors. He belted out the name of Bush’s campaign website, and said he was voting for the guy because Bush, man, he begins each day with one thing on his mind. He hops outta bed, “his two feet hit the floor, he scratches his balls, and says, ‘Let’s kill some fuckin’ terrorists.'” Dennis Miller not only sounds like Michael Savage, he’s beginning to look like him too, an oily stain possessing the power of speech.

And a vivid biker fantasy life, apparently. The “it’s hard work” boy wakes up every morning with his arms around his favorite pilly and screams for a cup ‘o cocoa.

You have to feel a little bit sorry for the cretin. He made a bad career move, casting his lot with the wingnuts because he got big laughs by making fun of Clinton and misinterpreted it as a shift in the cultural zeitgest. Big mistake. He’s stuck with bully insult humor and that has a very short shelf life. The former hipster is going to be forced to socialize for the rest of his life with nothing but boring, flaccid reactionaries who’s idea of fun is calling him “girlie-man” and saying he needs a haircut. That’s just sad.

Sick Pieces ‘O Work

On one of the blond succubi shows on FOXnews this morning (featuring Linda Vester and Ann Coulter) they cut away to a pouty lipped banshee who gleefully announced that Martha Stewart will be reporting to jail and that “she’ll be treated exactly like every other prisoner … including a strip search.”

I have little doubt that Coulter and Vester got visions of Abu Ghraib sugar plums dancing in their heads at the mere thought of the possibilities. This is the mentality that created Lyndie Englund and all her little friends. Sadistic, power mad freaks. They don’t get it from porno sites or even frat boy “hijinx.” It’s mainstream fun on right wing media.

Cheney’s Pants Spontaneously Immolated

Edwards was excellent as I knew he would be. Articulate, engaging and smart. If anybody had the mistaken idea that they could Quayle this guy, he certainly proved them wrong tonight.

But I think Cheney may have set a record for how many times a candidate can outright, baldfacedly lie in an hour and a half on national television. And that’s saying something. He and Junior really are living in some sort of dreamworld where they apparently don’t have to worry that their every previous public statement is noted and available for the whole world to see. Here on planet earth we have google and lexis-nexis and we can dig up all the examples of when they said things they claim they didn’t say.

The most obvious is Dick’s continued insistence that he’s never said there was a connection between al Qaeda and Saddam. Fergawd’s sake. But the debate was riddled with an amazing array of outright lies by Cheney from small ones like “I’d never met him before tonight” to huge ones like suggesting that there has been a drop in suicide bombings in Israel because Saddam isn’t paying a bounty. This article captures a few, but there are many more that will be fleshed out over the next few days.

I predict that once the full scope of the lies Cheney told tonight are artfully dribbled out by the Democrats over the next couple of days, Cheney’s respectable “draw” will turn into a rout. This isn’t 2000 and the Democrats are not going to stand for this shit this time.

As for the whores, I have to give extra special kudos to Joe Scarborough for the biggest slurpy Cheney blowjobs of the night, although it was difficult to choose from among his colleagues. But apparently, somebody put a horses head in Joey’s bed after his little “mistake” in calling the debate for Kerry last week because he really went the extra mile tonight.

Eric Boehlert wonders if the entire MSNBC crew even saw the same debate as the rest of us did:

The Cheney group hug began before Edwards had even exited the debate stage in Cleveland, with NBC reporter Andrea Mitchell declaring, “Dick Cheney did awfully well in putting John Edwards in his place.” MSNBC host and former Republican congressman Joe Scarborough, who didn’t flinch in naming Sen. John Kerry the debate winner last week, declared, “There’s no doubt about it, Edwards got obliterated by Dick Cheney.” (Perhaps he was trying to appease his right-wing fans who, he later remarked, flayed him alive for giving the debate to Kerry last week.) Newsweek’s managing editor Jon Meachem chimed in that Edwards seemed like “Kerry-lite,” while host Matthews skewered Edwards in a strangely personal way, reminiscent of the way Matthews hounded President Bill Clinton throughout the impeachment process.

“I don’t think this well-rehearsed and well-briefed senator from North Carolina was ready for the assault,” said Matthews, who insisted, “Dick Cheney was loaded for bear tonight. He went looking for squirrel and he found squirrel” in the form of Edwards. He later suggested Edwards often looked stunned, as if he’d been “slapped” by Cheney’s devastating debating technique. Matthews also demanded to know if the “liberal press” would admit “Cheney won.”

Yet nowhere else on the television landscape — not even on Fox News — was Cheney crowned the winner. Most pundits saw the debate as an obvious draw:

— ABC News political director Mark Halperin told PBS’s Charlie Rose the debate was a “nonevent because it didn’t change the dynamic.”

— Surveying fellow journalists covering the debate, CNN’s Judy Woodruff, host of “Inside Politics,” reported, “Their opinion is this debate was close to a draw.” She added, “If Dick Cheney was hoping to put away John Edwards, he didn’t do that tonight.”

— David Gergen, who has counseled both Democratic and Republican administrations, agreed that the debate was a standoff, telling CNN’s Larry King that “it ran out of electricity about halfway through. It began to drag.”

— Fox News’ Bill Kristol said, “Cheney clearly won the first half on national security. I think Edwards won the second half” on domestic issues. Kristol argued the first half was more important.

— “I can imagine Democratic living rooms, cheering every time Edwards punched. And Republican living rooms when Cheney punched,” said ABC News’ George Stephanopoulos. “But I don’t think either candidate did much to sway voters on the fence.”

ABC News’ instant poll found more viewers thought Cheney won the debate, by a margin of 43 to 35. But as ABC anchor Peter Jennings noted, the poll was weighted heavily toward Republican respondents because the network found more Republicans watched the debate.

CBS ran a scientific survey of 200 uncommitted voters nationwide, which found Edwards won the debate by a clear margin, 41-29. The CBS survey found Cheney suffered a dramatic gender gap among women voters.

None of that seemed to matter inside the MSNBC echo chamber. Matthews and his crew had their story line — Cheney won big! — and they were sticking with it, with Matthews even wondering out loud if the choice of Edwards for V.P. “casts doubt on the judgment of John Kerry,” and whether Edwards may “not be ready to be vice president of the United States.”

Which again raises the question: What debate was Matthews watching, and what did Edwards ever do to him?

Well gosh, nobody could expect Tweety and crew to not call this debate for Cheney. They had some big time ass to kiss after last week. They just hate getting nasty e-mails from angry Republicans. (I wonder how they are going to like getting erudite e-mails from angry Democrats?)

The biggest loser was Gwen Ifil. What an unmitigated disaster. But then, that’s no surprise. She has single handedly turned the previously great Washington Week In Review into DiGrassi Junior High, so I wasn’t particularly optimistic that she could moderate a debate. And she was probably up late last night talking to Condi, her best friend, about Condi’s unrequited love affair with you know who, so she was probably exhausted.

I predict a slight uptick in the polls as the undecideds start to make their move now that both Kerry and Edwards have passed the leadership threshhold. Friday could put it away.

Edwards!

Sadly, I will not be able to blog during or immediately after the debate tonight. I will watch it late and give my impressions in time for your morning coffee (or mimosa…)

To tide you over until debate time, I’d recommend you read this great, great speech by John Edwards from June of 2003 and remind yourself why John Kerry picked this talented, exceptional guy to be his running mate.

John Edwards is the man who George W. Bush is pretending to be.

I will eagerly look for your impressions in this thread as well as impressions of the media spin. I’d be grateful for any documented mediawhore outrages.

But, don’t wait for me. Here are the numbers. If they are out of hand, or out of line, don’t hesitate to let your fingers do the dialing. (If they are unbiased and objective, then it would be nice to let them know that as well.)

Contact Information:

ABC News

www.abcnews.com

47 W. 66th St

New York, NY 10023

Phone: (212) 456-7477, 456-3796

Fax: (212) 456-4866, 456-2795

World News Tonight with Peter Jennings

Phone: (212) 456-4040

peterjennings@worldnewstonight.abcnews.com

Fax: (212) 456-2771

CBS News

www.cbsnews.com

542 W. 57th St.

New York, NY 10019

News Desk:

Phone: (212) 975-4321, 975-3691

Fax: (212) 975-1893

CNN

www.cnn.com

1 CNN Center

POB 105366

Atlanta, GA 30348

Phone: (404) 827-1500

Fax: (404) 827-1593, (404) 827-1784

Fox News

www.foxnews.com

Speakout@foxnews.com

Viewerservices@foxnews.com

1211 Avenue of the Americas

New York, NY 10036

Phone: (212) 301-3000

Fax: (212) 301-4224

MSNBC

www.msnbc.com

world@msnbc.com

One MSNBC Plaza

Secaucus, NJ 07094

Phone: (201) 583-5000

Fax: (201) 583-5453

NBC News

www.nbc.com

30 Rockefeller Plaza

New York, NY 10112

Phone: (212) 664-5900

Fax: (212) 664-2914

NPR

www.npr.org

635 Mass Ave

Washington, DC 20001

Phone: (202) 414-2323

Fax: (202) 414-3324

PBS

www.pbs.org

PO BOX 50880

Washington, DC 20091

Phone: (800) 356-2626

Human Scum

Somebody needs to ask why Alan Colmes and Charlie Gibson, (one of the approved debate moderators) interviewed this shrieking harpy at all. And then, they should be asked whether they would have smiled and joked with a male Nazi terrorist (which is what this hideous dickhead is) at the end of the interview.

Coulter on former Democratic Senator Max Cleland (D-GA):

COULTER: As soon as he became the [Democrats’] designated hysteric [on President George W. Bush’s National Guard service], liberals were lying about how he lost limbs in Vietnam. It was not in combat. He did not win a Purple Heart. But suddenly, Democrats who thought a draft-dodging pot smoker would make an excellent commander in chief just eight years ago, now demand military service. They’ve all become jock-sniffers for war veterans. [ABC, Good Morning America, 10/5/04]

Cleland lost three limbs in a grenade explosion in Vietnam. He did not receive a Purple Heart because the wounds were not a result of enemy engagement. Cleland did receive “the Bronze Star for meritorious service and Silver Star for gallantry in action” for his service in Vietnam.

Coulter on Senator John Kerry:

CHARLIE GIBSON (co-host of Good Morning America): In going through the book, John Kerry, you refer to him as a gigolo, the male Anna Nicole Smith.

COULTER: Right.

[…]

COULTER: I don’t wanna hear him talk about a middle class tax cut when he has made his living, living off of rich women. I mean, it is simply a fact that he has married two heiresses, his specialty in life. I mean, if he has an economic plan, I think the one I’d like to hear about is how to snooker millionairesses into marrying me and living off them. I mean, that is not a trivial point. [ABC, Good Morning America, 10/5/04]

“They [Democrats] seem to think Kerry won the [September 30 presidential] debate because he had a better tan, he had a nice manicure.” [FOX News Channel, Hannity & Colmes, 10/4/04]

Coulter on Democrats:

COULTER: They never want to fight a war to defend America. They certainly wouldn’t have fought World War II. I mean, screaming about all the casualties in battle after battle, and Hitler was being contained. I mean, what is the right war at the right time? There will never be one.” [FOX News Channel, Hannity & Colmes, 10/1/04]

Coulter on the widows of the September 11 terror attacks:

GIBSON: And you also refer to some of those who lost their husbands in 9-11 as McWidows.

COULTER: Right. [ABC, Good Morning America, 10/5/04]

Coulter on Democratic National Committee chairman Terry McAuliffe:

GIBSON: Terry McAuliffe, the chairman of the Democratic Party, you call him a slimy weasel.

COULTER: Right. [ABC, Good Morning America, 10/5/04]

Coulter on Muslims:

Two days after the September 11, 2001, terror attacks, Coulter wrote about Muslims: “We should invade their countries, kill their leaders and convert them to Christianity” (as Media Matters for America has noted). On Hannity & Colmes, Coulter reinforced those sentiments, claiming, as she does in her new book, that they are true “[n]ow more than ever”:

ALAN COLMES (co-host of Hannity & Colmes): [R]ight after September 11, you said, and you know where I’m going with this, I’m often asked if I still think we should invade their countries, kill their leaders, convert them to Christianity. You say the same thing Nixon said in 1972: “Now more than ever.”

COULTER: Now more than ever.

[…]

COULTER: By Friday of 9/11, we had accomplished point one and point two. Invade their countries, killed their leaders.

[…]

COLMES: Would you like to convert these people all to Christianity?

COULTER: The ones that we haven’t killed, yes.

COLMES: So no one should be Muslim. They should all be Christian?

COULTER: That would be a good start, yes.

[…]

COLMES: But you’re talking about a group of extremists who misuse Islam and aren’t practicing true Islam. But would you like to convert all of these countries to Christianity. Should they all become Christian nations? Because that’s what your …

COULTER: Yes, that would be terrific.

COLMES: … remarks suggest.

COULTER: That would be terrific, yes. [FOX News Channel, Hannity & Colmes, 10/4/04]

Nobody Told Her?

New York Times:

Ms. Rice’s spokesman, Sean McCormack, said it was not her job to question intelligence reports or “to referee disputes in the intelligence community.”

Whitehouse.gov

Assistant to the President for National Security Affairs: Condoleezza Rice

Job Description: The National Security Advisor advises and assists the President on national security and foreign policies, and coordinates these policies among various government agencies.

Another GOP Victim

Rita Bianco, Parent: “Children should know their president and their first lady!”

Parents expressing outrage after a teacher is kicked out of her public school for hanging a picture of President Bush next to pictures of other presidents in her classroom.

Shiba Pillai-Diaz, Teacher: “It happened on a small bulletin board near the American flag and also with a poster of the Declaration of Independence.”

This is Crossroads South Middle School in Monmouth Junction, New Jersey. On Thursday, there was a back-to-school night for parents of students. Veteran English teacher Shiba Pillai-Diaz says she was shocked when three parents confronted her. The three, insisting the teacher either add John Kerry’s photo to the montage of presidents or remove the Bush photo. When Pillai-Diaz refused, she says the school’s vice-principal threatened her job which is an act that has parents here fuming.

Paula Sjolund, Parent: “She didn’t do anything wrong, and I think that it should have stayed up there.”

Pillai-Diaz ultimately removed the entire bulletin board and says School Principal Jim Warfel told her she disrupted the school with her “inflammatory politics”. She says he then ordered her out of the building. While she says she is a Bush supporter in her personal life, Pillai-Diaz says she keeps politics out of the classroom.

Shiba Pillai-Diaz, Teacher: “There was no political intent, nor was there any political content in that photograph nor on the bulletin board.”

How awful. As much as I dislike Bush, I don’t think it’s wrong to have a simple picture of the president and his dog on a junior high school bulletin board.

Oh wait…

Recently, the school administration began receiving complaints from students and parents that Ms. Pillai-Diaz was using her position, classroom and teaching time to engage in partisan politics. Students reported that she had made statements which denigrated one party over the other. The conversations included Ms. Pillai-Diaz telling some students who offered opinions contrary to her statements, that she was “glad they were not old enough to vote.” Other comments to students, including such statements as, “you should be ashamed to be a Democrat” have been verified through student interviews.

[…]

Following receipt of complaints from parents, the Assistant Principal met with Ms. Pillai-Diaz and cautioned her not to engage in partisan political discussions in her Language Arts classes. He did not initially ask her to remove the picture of the President. As the issue grew in intensity, the teacher herself chose to remove the stuffed elephant because of student comments. In the ensuing days, parents expressed increasing concern about the teacher’s classroom behavior, the misuse of classroom instructional time and the personal bulletin board. The level of concern resulted in a classroom confrontation between some parents and Ms. Pillai-Diaz at the Back-to-School night program. It was at this point that the school administration decided to intervene again.

On Friday morning, October 1, Ms. Pillai-Diaz was directed by the Assistant Principal to remove bulletin board materials because they were being viewed as contributing to an ongoing disruption of the teaching-learning environment. She refused. She then met with the Principal who repeated the directive. At this point, Ms. Pillai-Diaz abruptly left the building, abandoning her post of duty and her classroom responsibilities.

At no time was she told to leave, asked to leave or given authorization to leave. School was still in session. At no time was she told she was suspended or fired. With professional responsibilities of a classroom teacher waiting, Ms. Pillai-Diaz chose, of her own volition, to walk out of the school, contact various media sources and claim she had been fired.

[…]

The South Brunswick School community is enormously respectful of the Office of the President of the United States, President Bush and the democratic process for choosing our President. Anyone trying to suggest the contrary has the worst of intentions. Under other circumstances, the display of a picture of the President would have been viewed as completely appropriate and uncontroversial. It is important to note that pictures of President Bush are openly displayed in all of the South Brunswick Schools. The teacher’s own actions here, however, took it out of the realm of education and made the presentation appear partisan to many of our students and parents. Under these circumstances, our actions in directing the removal of the display were singularly appropriate

A Republican intimidating twelve year old kids and then whining to the media about being victimized when the parents complain? How utterly … predictable.

The Moderate Voice has the whole story.

The Poorman says:

CYA Files

And so it begins…

L. Paul Bremer III, former head of the U.S.-led occupation authority in Iraq, said Monday that the United States did not deploy enough troops and then failed to contain violence and looting immediately after the ouster of President Saddam Hussein.

Bremer, administrator for the Coalition Provisional Authority until the hand-over of political power June 28, said that he still supported the decision to intervene in Iraq but that a lack of adequate forces hampered the occupation and efforts to end the looting early on.

“We paid a big price for not stopping it because it established an atmosphere of lawlessness,” he told an insurance conference in White Sulphur Springs, W.Va. “We never had enough troops on the ground.”

Bremer’s comments echoed contentions of other critics of the Bush administration, including Democratic presidential nominee John F. Kerry, who say the U.S. government failed to plan adequately to maintain security in Iraq after the invasion.

On Sept. 17 at DePauw University, Bremer said, “The single most important change — the one thing that would have improved the situation — would have been having more troops in Iraq at the beginning and throughout” the occupation, according to the Banner-Graphic in Greencastle, Ind

[…]

“I believe that we currently have sufficient troop levels in Iraq,” he said in an e-mailed statement. He said all references in recent speeches to troop levels applied to the situation when he arrived in Baghdad in May 2003 “and when I believed we needed either more coalition troops or Iraqi security forces to address the looting.”

(Hahaha! Yes, If only we’d had more Iraqi security forces available to address the looting. Surprisingly, they thought we an invading army at the time and didn’t rush to help. Particularly since they would have been shot.)

Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld conceded Monday that U.S. intelligence was wrong in its conclusions that Iraq had weapons of mass destruction, and appeared to back off earlier statements suggesting former Iraqi President Saddam Hussein had links to al Qaeda.

“Why the intelligence proved wrong (on WMDs), I’m not in a position to say,” Rumsfeld said in remarks to the Council on Foreign Relations in New York. “I simply don’t know.”

When asked about any connection between Saddam Hussein and al Qaeda, Rumsfeld said, “To my knowledge, I have not seen any strong, hard evidence that links the two.”

But a short time later, Rumsfeld released a statement: “A question I answered today at an appearance before the Council on Foreign Relations regarding ties between Al Qaeda and Iraq regrettably was misunderstood.

“I have acknowledged since September 2002 that there were ties between Al Qaeda and Iraq.

When the handwriting is on the wall, it’s prudent to get your “true” position on the record before anyone thinks you were responsible for the failure.

No Samaritan

Matthews just interviewed Joe Lockhart and mentioned the new zogby poll question “If your car was broken down on the side of the road, who do you think would stop and help you?” Shockingly, 32% said John Kerry and 40% said Junior.

Unbelievable. It is indisputable that John Kerry saved Jim Rassman’s life in Vietnam, which should be enough to prove that Kerry not only will stop and help you fix your car, he will rush across 6 lanes of traffic to do it. (Our swift boat pals have so successfully lied and schemed that this image of Kerry has been forever tainted, to their enternal damnation.)

However, Rassman wasn’t the only life that Kerry famously saved. How about this one:

Former U.S. Sen. Chic Hecht of Nevada is a staunch Republican, but he thanks his lucky stars for Democratic presidential hopeful Sen. John Kerry of Massachusetts.

On July 12, 1988, Hecht was attending a weekly Republican luncheon when a piece of apple lodged firmly in his throat.

Hecht stumbled out of the room, thinking he might vomit but not wanting to do it in front of his colleagues. Sen. Kit Bond, R-Mo., thumped his back, but Hecht quickly passed out in the hallway.

Just then, Kerry stepped off an elevator, rushed to Hecht’s side and gave him the Heimlich maneuver — four times.

The lifesaving incident made international news, and Dr. Henry Heimlich, who invented the maneuver in 1974, called Hecht to say that had Kerry intervened just 30 seconds later Hecht might have been in a vegetative state for life.

“This man gave me my life,” the 75-year-old Hecht said Thursday.

Hecht said he was amazed that Kerry acted so quickly — some people were assuming that he was having a heart attack.

“He knew exactly what to do,” he said. “But a lot of people know what to do. They just don’t size up the situation immediately.”

The story has a twist of irony: Hecht was up for re-election that year, and Kerry, who was serving as the chairman of the Democratic Senatorial Campaign Committee, had pegged Hecht as one of the most vulnerable Republican seats.

Indeed, the Democratic nominee for Hecht’s seat, then-Gov. Richard Bryan, beat Hecht, who served just one term in office.

“Only in America can this happen, where he’s working against me to get me defeated and then saves my life,” Hecht said.

Hecht, who prides himself on having one of the most conservative records on the books during his six years in the Senate, said he and his wife, Gail, see politics as “a secondary issue” when it comes to Kerry.

“We’ve had a wonderful life, and it would have all been down the tubes,” said Hecht, who is about to celebrate his 45th wedding anniversary with his wife.

Every year the Hechts call Kerry’s longtime personal secretary, who tracks down Kerry wherever he is.

Then they recount some of their experiences in the last year. Hecht and his wife thank Kerry for thinking so quickly in the Senate halls that day. And Kerry tells them that their phone call is one of his favorites of the year.

“He’s so nice and appreciative,” Hecht said.

Ther Daily Show did a spoof of this and I suspect that many people thought it was a joke. But it’s actually true. Kerry stepped off the elevator, immediately assessed the situation and then saved the guys life while a bunch of others stood around dithering. (Compare this to Bush frozen in a little boys chair reading ‘The Pet Goat” after Andy Card said, “We are under attack.”)

Is there even one example of George W. Bush doing a personal good deed ever in his life? I honestly can’t think of one.

In fact, even aside from all of his cruel policy decisions (like approving the use of TORTURE for instance) there are many small indications that this guy is totally lacking compassion for his fellow man — even his own family.

Remember James Byrd’s family in Jasper texas begging him to help them pass hate crimes legislation?

“I went in there pleading to him,” Mullins says. “I said that if he helped me move it along I would feel that he hadn’t died in vain … [Rep.] Thompson said, ‘Gov. Bush, what Renee’s trying to say is, Would you help her pass the bill?’ And he said, ‘No.’ Just like that.”

“He had a nonchalant attitude, like he wanted to hurry up and get out of there,” Mullins says. “It was cold in that room.”

Remember when his daughter had an emergency appendectomy?

As he boarded the plane, reporters inquired about Jenna’s condition. ‘Maybe she’ll be able to join us in Florida,’ the president-elect said. ‘If not, she can clean her room.’ The reporters stared at him, stunned. ‘I couldn’t believe it,’ one of those present later said. ‘First of all, I’m a father, and I cannot imagine a scenario in which my daughter would have major surgery and I would just leave on vacation. And then he just seemed so snarly about it, like he was pissed at her.'”

Not only wouldn’t he stop to help you at the side of the road, he’s the type who’d slow down and stare at you, then laugh uproariously and hit the gas, spraying gravel in your face as he sped away.