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Glad You Brought That Up

Here’s what the paper of record has on its front page right now:

Polls Show Some Gains for Kerry, but Race Is Tight

By ADAM NAGOURNEY 11:58 PM ET

Polls showed the smallest postconvention bounce for a challenger since George McGovern was nominated in 1972.

Frank Luntz himself couldn’t have spun it better.

September Surprise?

Robert Kuttner outlines Kerry’s challenges going into the election and I agree with him when he says:

The country has grave doubts about Bush’s leadership. But everything I know about politics tells me that Election Night 2004 will be another nail-biter.

He discusses certain well-trod issues like the damning electoral math, the increasingly obstructive nature of the press and this month’s money disadvantage. But, he brings up something I, at least, hadn’t heard before and it’s something that Bush can easily arrange:

Well placed sources say that Bush’s client government in Baghdad will put Saddam Hussein on trial, conveniently, in September. (It took years to prepare the Milosevic trial, but the efficient Iraqis will display Saddam in time for the US election.)

Saddam’s outrages will be paraded on live American TV, reinforcing the idea that the Iraq war, no matter what the misrepresentations and blunders, was justified. Of course, nobody is debating whether Saddam was a vicious tyrant. The issue is whether America should have rushed to war on false information, without allies, and without a competent plan for the aftermath. Still, a September show trial will be a Bush propaganda coup.

It could be enough of a pageant to get the whores all excited and wearing their little flag pins again. It puts Iraq into play in a positive way — here’s our victory for freedom and democracy. His little puppet Allawi will be happy to comply, I have no doubt.

The best we could hope for in this scenario would be for Saddam’s prostate to act up. Dear gawd.

Outrage!

Much of the information that led the authorities to raise the terror alert at several large financial institutions in the New York City and Washington areas was three or four years old, intelligence and law enforcement officials said on Monday. They reported that they had not yet found concrete evidence that a terror plot or preparatory surveillance operations were still under way.

[…]

“You could say that the bulk of this information is old, but we know that Al Qaeda collects, collects, collects until they’re comfortable,” said one senior government official. “Only then do they carry out an operation. And there are signs that some of this may have been updated or may be more recent.”

Frances Fragos Townsend, the White House homeland security adviser, said on Monday in an interview on PBS that surveillance reports, apparently collected by Qaeda operatives had been “gathered in 2000 and 2001.” But she added that information may have been updated as recently as January.

The comments of government officials on Monday seemed softer in tone than the warning issued the day before. On Sunday, officials were circumspect in discussing when the surveillance of the financial institutions had occurred, and Homeland Security Secretary Tom Ridge cited the quantity of intelligence from “multiple reporting streams” that he said was “alarming in both the amount and specificity of the information.”

That tears it. The drama of that announcement yesterday was just short of “Run for your lives!” Ridge gave a Bush campaign speech in the middle of it. And, the information was gathered before 9/11, fergawdsake. Al Qaeda doesn’t have to attack, Bush is getting the same results all by himself.

I can’t believe that I still had some faith in the integrity of this government. Jesus H. Christ, you really cannot believe anything these people say. Nada.

Update: Atrios has Judy Botox reading the RNC talking points about Howard Dean’s totally off the wall suggestion that Ridge’s announcement was, shall we say, politically convenient. Maybe the hair-do just takes so long that she doesn’t have time to do anything but regurgitate Republican talking points. They make it so convenient, faxing it right to her in easy to read format and all. (And they’re so wickedly delicious.)

On the other hand, she’s been doing exactly the same thing for at least six years. But no matter how much she tries to be as “edgy” (read: wingnutty) as FOXNews they still beat her in the ratings. She’s a trooper, though. She won’t give up until she’s Neil Cavuto’s bitch.

Straw Man For President

Salon’s War Room notes that Junior and Uncle Dick are going around saying that the Democrats want to negotiate with al-Qaeda.

“See, evidently some must think that you can negotiate with them, you can talk sense with them, you can hope that they change,” President Bush said during his Rose Garden appearance Monday morning. Vice President Cheney, speaking at Peterson Air Force Base in Colorado, warned that al Qaida “is not a foe we can reason with, or negotiate with, or appease. This is . . . an enemy that we must vanquish.”

[…]

Where did the Bush-Cheney machine get the idea that Kerry would negotiate with or appease terrorists? CNN’s Judy Woodruff put that question to White House Communications Director Dan Bartlett Monday. He responded by changing the subject to the “explaining” Kerry must do about his votes on the Iraq war.

In the old days presidents were forced to face the press once in a while and the press would ask them questions like this and demand specific answers until they got something resembling an explanation. Today, we have “press availabilities” with functionaries who answer questions that haven’t been asked and the press just nods and moves on.

The president and vice president are not outright lying, of course. They said “some must think.” They didn’t name John Kerry. Indeed, they could very well be talking about their coalition of the willing friend and colleague Phillippines President Gloria Macapagal Arroyo who negotiated with “terrorists” in Iraq against the United States’s wishes just a week or so ago. Or they could be referring to our allies the Jordanian and Egyptian governments who’ve both been accused of negotiating with Iraqi insurgents in recent cases. And as the Salon article pointed out, they could even be talking about Ronald Reagan who also negotiated with terrorists and even sold them weapons (not that he recalled doing it.)

So they can say that it is not fair to condemn them for accusing John Kerry when there are so many other possible ways to interpret their words. They can’t help it if Americans automatically assume that they are talking about that Democrat pussy. That’s his problem.

To tell you the truth, I don’t know quite what to make of this. They have always operated as the “you can believe me or you can believe your lyin’ eyes” administration, but I think they are relying a little bit too much here on hate radio and outmoded stereotypes to carry swing voters. Nobody who saw Kerry’s speech the other night could possibly believe that he said anything about negotiating with terrorists. I’m not sure anyone who hasn’t been totally brainwashed by Limbaugh would believe this. This is right wing red meat politics and it’s a bit strange to see them shoring up their base this blatantly from the Rose Garden, especially as they try to make their run to the middle.

I’m really beginning to wonder if they haven’t arranged to manipulate the voting machines in a couple of the battleground states. It’s hard to see how they win with only their committed firebreathers and that really seems to be their strategy.

Heart ‘n Soulman

Atrios has a nice story about Vincent Gallo, newest GOP hearthrob. now, here’s a Hollywood star with something to say.

Kevin at Catch posted a few days back about Mr. Gallo’s family values including a lovely picture of him with The New York Young Republican Club. (Click that link. You have to see it to believe it.) He also excerpted some extremely incisive comments that Gallo recently shared with Paper magazine. He’s a lovely young man. Nothing like that (black) Whoopie Goldberg. I can’t wait to hear Chris Matthews interview him.

HIM[Gallo]: I don’t trust or love anyone.

ME: Why?

HIM: Because people are all creepy. Creepy creepy creeps. Creeping around. Creeping here and creeping there. Creeping everywhere. Crippity crappity creepies.

ME: Who do you think are the creepiest?

HIM: I’m glad you asked. Well, there’s that rat bastard, Tracy Falco, the backstabber from Ted Demme’s company; that twisted phony Rene Ricard; Kate Miller that lesbo monster; Kelly Lynch that bullshit bad actress, she’s the queen member of the lucky club; Tim Roth, that filthy no-talent mini dwarf Brit; Bill and Hillary Clinton and their ugly orphan-like daughter Chelsea; Greta Seacat and her poisoned mind ‘acting coach,’ my ass; Susan Bertram, that Judas piece of crap, listen everybody, she’s the worst wardrobe person in the world, don’t hire her for your film; Mark Romanek, that dark, anal photo plagiarist and his useless penis, he’s a great example of a world gone wrong; Cheryl ‘Dumpy’ Dunn and her pigeon dung photographs, wow is she creepy; Phil Goldfarb that AlAnon basketcase, worst producer who ever lived; Jennifer ‘Leave me alone’ Levy; Dewey’s friend, Analisa ‘The character assassin’ Tessin; Vicky Icky she was so sticky Galvez Bici; that lumpy-assed Alba Clemente; Paul ‘I can’t direct but boy, can I brown nose my way to the top’ Anderson and his fermented, mulatto cannabis-soaked girlfriend Fiona Apple who coulda been shoulda been; Kelly Lynch’s bitch-whipped husband Mitch; Nam-Anh Duong; John Kennedy Jr. that philandering cadaver; my Ex-Mother-in-law; Tammy -Sick Sick Sick and Ugly Ugly Ugly- Rosen, that jerk; Todd -you wish you had my rod-Feldman, that short Jew bastard and his polluted and dishonest cousin Eileen Feldman, it’s a miracle anyone can even make a movie with assholes like this in Hollywood; Davis “Boy Does a Herpes Sore Smell” LaChapellle; everyone at Lions Gate films, is that the best Canada has to offer, a bunch of lowlifes like that?; Jefferson “What a” Hack from Dazed and Confused magazine are they still in business? Cause I heard all he does now is fetch cocaine for Kate Moss; Dale “H like in Homo, I like in In-his-ass, and V like in Virus” Peck I dare anyone to stay awake through one of his novels. That’s some creepy losers right there, huh? Huh? And what about the actress Zoey “Go Ahead and Blow Me” Deschanel, you fuckin’ lying whore, I’ll get you; from Universal Home DVD Releases, Colleen Benn(d her over and fuck her fat asshole); Suzanne “Pockface” Nichols and her pockmarked nipples; Michael “Musty” Musto (faggot); Andrew “Drew a picture of his penis on a matchbook actual size” Richardson and his syphillytic boyfriend Bob Racine [hairstylist, look it up]; And from Connecticut without Etiquette, Chloe Sevigny, who when she’s not drunk and posing in movies is busy out spreading Harmony Korine’s herpes. Oh yeah, and my mother. Mamma Creepy Corleone. And my father, the Godfather of Creepy.

Oh and he ended it with “And may God bless the United States of America.”

If he moves to Illinois in the next week, can they still get him on the ballot?

Tuck You, Carlson

I missed this last week, but via Altercation I read that Tim Grieve of Salon cornered Tucker Carlson on his disgusting “jacuzzi case” comments:

We saw Carlson in the halls of the Fleet Center this week, and we asked him about the flak he’s taking. He said he hadn’t heard about it, and he offered a testy defense.

“My contention is not that the girl wasn’t grievously injured or deserves compensation, nor is it that he doesn’t have the right to make $8 million off her suffering. My only point is that if you’re going to make 7 or 8 or 6 or whatever million dollars off her suffering, don’t claim it’s an altruistic act,” Carlson said.

Right, but isn’t calling it a “Jacuzzi case” — without further explanation — somehow dismissive of what actually happened? “Are you going to lecture me? Are you going to ask me a question or lecture me? My point is not that it’s a wine-and-cheese thing, and I’m not against Jacuzzis. That’s not my point at all.”

Carlson said calling the Lakey tragedy a “Jacuzzi case” is just a “shorthand” way to ask whether Edwards should really be seen as acting altruistically for the “little people” when he made so much money off the case. “I’m merely saying that, if you’re going to make all that money, don’t turn around and tell me that you’re better than I am,” Carlson said.

Does “Jacuzzi case” really convey that point? Couldn’t he call it something else? “Maybe I could, but that’s an evasion of the point I’m making. You’re getting into whether I should call it a ‘pool case.’ OK, fine, call it a ‘pool case.’ I’m sorry I called it a ‘Jacuzzi case.'”

So you’re sorry? You won’t call it a “Jacuzzi case” anymore? “No, I’m not sorry I called it a Jacuzzi case. I’m sorry that you’re unwilling to answer what I think is a pretty serious question I’m posing.”

Not the best spin I’ve ever heard. The bitchy little heather doesn’t like to be called on his nasty little digs, does he? He loses his famous sense of humor when somebody confronts him with his malicious prattle and exposes his vicious mean-girl backbiting.

Crazed Neocon On The Loose

Yesterday I wrote that I thought this might just validate those Capital Hill Blue stories about Bush being on drugs.

Laura Rozen says, “This administration is insane. I have no words.”

Kevin Drum thinks “it’s really pretty bizarre.”

Matthew Yglesias calls his post on the topic “The Horror, The Horror.”

This has to be the work of “The Mouth That Roared” John Bolton, Under Secretary of State for Arms Control and International Security (a title that this man could hold only in Bizarro world.) Ostensibly he works for Colin Powell, but as with everything else, Powell has been competely ineffectual in controlling him.

This is a very stupid thing for Junior’s administration to do and I think that Kerry could make some news with it. Based upon nothing more than a gut feeling, I think that the American people would find it extremely odd that the American government is against nuclear inspections. Maybe I’m wrong and they all think it’s some sort of black helicopter UN plot to take over the world, but I doubt it. People are a little bit more tuned in than they used to be to this stuff and I think they would at least find it questionable.

And, regardless of the political merits, the policy itself is completely wrongheaded.

Leftwing Latenight

Here’s some good news for night owls and the TIVOed:

Franken radio show to be on cable TV

Beginning Sept. 7, “The Al Franken Show,” heard live each weekday from noon to 3 p.m. Eastern on Air America Radio, will go on display in a one-hour edition on Sundance each night at 11:30 p.m. and 2:30 a.m., executives at both networks told The Associated Press on Monday.

The “Franken” TV hour is currently scheduled through the November election, but all parties voiced hope the show would continue on Sundance indefinitely.

It will help to fill that lonely time after The Daily Show when you just want to keep the high going for a little while longer.

Moralist Misogyny

I just love these sex toy bans, which apparently are “springing up” all over the country. It isn’t sex-toys per se that they are banning. It’s “vibrators and other products meant to stimulate the sex organs.”

So, according to the morals police, women are not supposed to have premarital sex, the courts decide when they do and don’t own their own bodies and they should be coerced by the government into staying in marriages with men who treat them like shit for the sake of the children.

Women should make all these sacrifices in the name of “family values” and now they won’t even let the poor gals buy a vibrator? Jesus, what’s next? Female circumcision?

You notice the flabby old men who wrote the law didn’t outlaw Viagra.

Poll-eaxed

Donkey Rising has the analysis of this Gallup poll showing Kerry actually losing ground even though he scored significantly higher on all of the specific questions. It seems that the numbers fell significantly on Saturday for reasons unknown. I thought Saturday was an especially slow news day and blogged a couple of navel gazing posts because of it. I have no idea why this might be, and it’s likely some sort of statistical glitch. But it is now conventional wisdom that Kerry didn’t get a bounce and that means it’s likely to be a self-fulfilling prophesy. You can liken it to the debate coverage in 2000. Immediately after the first debate most people believed that Gore had won it without difficulty. But, once the spin took hold the numbers turned around and Bush was declared the winner.

From what I gather, however, the Kerry camp isn’t worried about this. It seems that they are gearing up for a tight race and that’s probably smart. Turn-out is key and for us turn out will be enhanced by the propect of another stolen election if the polls show it’s close. I don’t think they are going to worry too much unless Bush gets some serious traction or Kerry slips too far behind. It’s not that it wouldn’t be nice to have a handsome lead, but it’s only the beginning of August and a lot can happen between now and November.