Tightening the Scrunchie

I don’t want to hear any more belly aching from liberal pansies about how we aren’t getting the terrorists. We are not only smokin ’em out of their caves we are ruthlessly depriving them of their perms and sun-kissed highlighting.

U.S. forces in Iraq said on Saturday that they were holding a man suspected of acting as a barber to senior al Qaeda militants and helping them change their appearance to evade capture.

The man, named as Walid Muhammad Farhan Juwar al-Zubaydi — “aka ‘The Barber,”‘ the U.S. military statement said — was arrested in Baghdad on September 24, the day before U.S. troops caught up with and killed a militant they described as the most senior al Qaeda leader in the capital, Abu Azzam.

“‘The Barber’s’ duties included altering senior al Qaeda in Iraq members’ appearances by dying hair color, altering hairstyles and changing facial hair in their efforts to evade capture,” the military said in the statement.

The vicious bastard. I hope they “render” him straight to Fantastic Sam’s and play Toby Keith over and over until he gives up bin Laden’s hair color formula.

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