Romney Doubles Down
by David Atkins (“thereisnospoon”)
Mitt Romney knows the “people” he can really count on, and he’s determined to stand up for his best friends:
At a friendly Republican gathering here tonight, presidential candidate Mitt Romney defended his recent comment in Iowa that “corporations are people” and said Democrats fundamentally misunderstand corporations’ makeup. “Businesses are people,” he said.
“What do they think they are? Little men from Mars?” Romney said at the home of Ovide Lamontagne, a prominent New Hampshire Republican and former Senate candidate.
Romney said the Obama administration’s view of business is antiquated and stuck in the 1960s.
“At that time, there was a sentiment somehow that businesses were bad, that it was anti-people. And the Obama administration seems to think that the 60s is here again. Business is good. I am talking about repair shops and gas stations and beauty salons and restaurants. I am talking about Apple Computer and Facebook and Microsoft,” Romney said.
Ahem…uh…Mitt? You might want to rethink that line about the 1960s. Even your own propaganda organ the American Enterprise Institute has to admit that the economy of the 1960s was pretty smokin’:
The first five years of the expansion that began in February 1961 resembled the golden age of the current expansion. That golden age only emerged in 1995, four years after the expansion began. From 1961 through 1965, U.S. private investment grew strongly, more rapidly than it did from 1991 through 1995…
The first half of the 1960s expansion was also characterized by extreme optimism about the ability of the government to manage the economy.
Now, the AEI then goes on to argue, in a piece written around the Millennium, that the cutting of government regulations and increases in private sector wealth and stock prices meant that conservative policies were working much better than those benighted fools of the 1960s who figured Keynesian policies were the answer. Which only proves that anyone who pays attention to the prognostications and ideological ramblings of the AEI is an economic incompetent.
Anyway, let’s ignore the plainly laughable notion that Barack Obama is a 1960s liberal, or even anywhere to the left of Richard Nixon from a public policy standpoint (Nixon’s fascistic political tendencies and racism notwithstanding.) Remember that in the 1960s, not only could America land a man on the moon, fight a Cold War against a massive superpower, and build an entire nationwide highway system, we could also provide practically free college educations to anyone who qualified. Good thing those awful days are over, and the world is much friendlier to corporations that employ just under 2,000 people while thieving your privacy and racking up a 25% profit margin while doing it. Or corporations that somehow maintain credibility with progressives despite selling overpriced products at a 42% profit margin. Or, you know, beloved people the world over. People like his best friend Mr. John Microsoft.
Hey, you may have to go $100,000 in student loan debt, your bridges may be in disrepair, your water mains may not work, we may have to cut back your social security and get rid of your Medicare, we may not have a space program left, but look on the bright side: you can get an iPod with your McJob today! Couldn’t do that in 1965. No sirree. Ain’t life grand today now that we’re so much more business friendly?
Well, maybe not for you. But it sure is swell for the $250 million man. His best friends have made him a lot of money. They’re people, too, and you hippies should be grateful for all the money he’s made, now that your lives have been vastly improved by the privilege of being poked by his friend Mark Zuckerberg Mr. Adam Facebook. All rights reserved, of course.