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“The kidney has a very special place in the heart”

“The kidney has a very special place in the heart”

by digby

Roy Edroso looks into his crystal ball and sees the future:

Donald Trump, September 11, 2019 rally in Mobile, Alabama: “I went to the September 11, eleven of the worst September in the history of the world. The towers falling like snow, though it was September. Snow in September, and they say there’s global warming. Mexico was cheering, cheering in their native Mexican, saying ‘hasta la vista,’ so terrible. Eleven hours of terrible torture in fire and carnage with duct tape over their mouths in a van. A shame. And that my friends is why we must LOCK UP THAT WALL!”

Victor David Hanson, National Review, the next day: “Trump breaks through the cant and sophistry of our modern Nabobs with simple yet elegant solecistic poeticisms. When Aeschines spoke, they said, ‘How well he speaks.’ But when Trump speaks, they say, ‘MAGA, OO-rah, long live King Trump!’”

Donald Trump, December 31, 2019, New Year’s Eve speech from Mar-a-Lago:“This is a new year of wonders with men in the space, moon, dog. Dog in the moon, eyes in the head, magic, and the man, Bill, my friend, my dear friend, saying ‘See you. Sir. God bless you sir. You have made America… a great hot dog. Very hot. A dog. God bless you sir. God bless you.’ God bless, as Red Skelton, the great architect, said, and happy new year, 1964, the year we defeated the Allies.”

D.C. McAllister, PJ Media, next day: “Liberals are symbolic analysts — that is, wimps — so they just can’t see that Trump is speaking to the heart rather than the mind. And speaking as a grown-ass woman, he speaks also to my loins. With all that ‘sir’ there is a serious daddy vibe going on here, and I am feeling it. I would happily give this great man, this real man, some sir-vice sex.”

Donald Trump, February 2, 2020, impromptu press conference:Then pull me out. I am half crazy. They won’t let me get up. They dyed my shoes. Open those shoes. Give me something. I am so sick. Give me some water, the only thing that I want.”

Rod Dreher, The American Conservative, the next day: “But what choice did Trump have? Affirm his Christian beliefs, and be mocked, vilified, and deplatformed by the homosexual Mafia? I think he was wise to go the way he did and answer all the liberals’ ‘facts’ and ‘science’ with gibberish; there’s something very Benedict Option about it. And besides, a reader I’ll call ‘Mr. X,’ because he can’t let the homosexuals who run his subdivision know he is of the Lord, points out this passage from the Book of Proverbs (I know, the Bible is rather crude compared to the arcane spiritual authorities I usually quote, but in this case I find it apposite):

The woman Folly is loud; she is seductive and knows nothing. She sits at the door of her house; she takes a seat on the highest places of the town, calling to those who pass by, who are going straight on their way, “Whoever is simple, let him turn in here!” And to him who lacks sense she says, “Stolen water is sweet, and bread eaten in secret is pleasant.

“Isn’t the White House one of ‘the highest places of the town’? And isn’t the sweet stolen water the 2016 election? I don’t say that Trump is a godly man, but if, as I have suggested, God is working through him, unworthy vessel that he is, might he be unconsciously channeling the Scriptures? Perhaps God is telling us through Trump that the Lavender Social Justice Mob has ‘dyed His shoes,’ and this has made Him sick, and He is calling for water to, in the words of Al Bundy, wash the gay away. I’m still in Paris and have to go soon to eat a ten-course meal and take pictures of it, but tomorrow I will share the wisdom of ‘Sarah T.,’ a lesbian socialist vegetarian who hates all other lesbians, socialists, and vegetarians and has much to say on this subject.”

Donald Trump, March 10, 2020, wandering Pennsylvania Avenue with his pants down
: “[flutters his lips with his index finger] Be-be-be-be-be-be-be-be-be-be-be-be-be-be.[soils self].”

New York Post front page, the next day: “AMERICA IS BACK!”

This is absolutely correct. There is NOTHING he could do or say that would break the spell. I wish I understood it, but I never will.

That’s from Edroso’s newsletter, which you should sign up for, here. It’s a necessary little bit of hilarity and outrage in my day.

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