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Not The Onion

No really:

Transportation Secretary Sean Duffy will announce expedited plans this week to build a nuclear reactor on the moon, the first major action by the former Fox News host as the interim NASA administrator.

NASA has discussed building a reactor on the lunar surface, but this would set a more definitive timeline — according to documents obtained by POLITICO — and come just as the agency faces a massive budget cut. The move also underscores how Duffy, who faced pushback from lawmakers about handling two jobs, wants to play a role in NASA policymaking. “It is about winning the second space race,” said a NASA senior official, granted anonymity to discuss the documents ahead of their wider release.

President Donald Trump named Duffy as interim administrator in July after abruptly withdrawing the nomination of billionaire Jared Isaacman amid a spat with the nominee’s ally, Elon Musk.

Duffy also offered a directive to more quickly replace the International Space Station, another NASA goal. The two moves could help accelerate U.S. efforts to reach the moon and Mars — a goal that China is also pursuing.

The plans align with the Trump administration’s focus on crewed spaceflight. The White House has proposed a budget that would increase human spaceflight funds for 2026, even as it advocates for major slashes to other programs — including a nearly 50 percent cut for science missions.

Who needs science for space programs? Just shoot people into space and build nuclear reactors on the moon. Winning!

Sometimes I feel that this is all some kind of simulation to make me feel like I’m losing my mind.

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