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Here We Are Now. Entertain Us!

by tristero

As I was about to start writing this, I became distracted by the latest atrocity in the Bush/Iraq war, 21 people dying in an attack on a bus, including 12 high school students. It may seem pointless, perhaps to the point of being obscene, to focus instead on an extremely subtle issue of presentation and rhetoric and do so at extreme length. But I’m trying to understand how the US got taken over by such an incompetent band of extremists and I want to find ways to prevent them from retaining power. I have some sort of sensitivity to rhetorical devices and techniques, and since I think that is an important part of the answer and of the solution, I’ll go on and write what I intended to. For I know that if the far right continues to have influence far in excess either to their popular support or their woeful talent, today’s massacre, and our horror-filled reaction to it, will look like the good old days to our kids.

There’s a rather listless article by Elizabeth Drew about the bipartisan alarm over Bush’s signing statements in the current New York Review of Books – dull, because there is nothing added to the story, not that the story itself is anything other than infuriating and ominous (btw, Drew has written extremely well on Bush in the past; this one is an exception among the ones I’ve read). But a striking conjunction of quotes caught my interest towards the end of Drew’s essay:

People with very disparate political views, such as Grover Norquist and Dianne Feinstein, worry about the long-term implications of Bush’s power grab. Norquist said, “These are all the powers that you don’t want Hillary Clinton to have.” Feinstein says, “I think it’s very dangerous because other presidents will come along and this sets a precedent for them.” Therefore, she says, “it’s very important that Congress grapple with and make decisions about what our policies should be on torture, rendition, detainees, and wiretapping lest Bush’s claimed right to set the policies, or his policies themselves, become a precedent for future presidents.”

To cut directly to the point, this is a perfect illustration both of the problem with mainstream Democratic rhetoric, and the dangerous effectiveness of far-right Republican operatives. It’s almost as of they’re speaking two different dialects. I don’t wanna make two much of the dialect conceit, but it may be useful as a rule of thumb to start us off.

Norquist speaks what I’ll call TeeVee, the dialect we hear on television, not only on the news, but in nearly every commercial, every sitcom, the Simpsons, late night comedy shows, and so on. Like everything else you hear in TeeVee, Norquist’s statement is concise and all-but-exclusively monosyllabic: the vocabulary is more restricted than a 6 year-old’s. But that is noted not so much to disparage it as to describe it. Because Norquist’s statement is also crudely witty – it will certainly get an appreciative snort from many Hillary-bashers, a calculated kind of we’re-all-vulgar-together kind of wit. But there’s even more to it than that.

Norquist also uses, and to great effect, two levels of personalization, a prime feature of TeeVee dialect. First of all, the audience is directly addressed – “you” – and almost instinctively you – we – snap to attention. (“You deserve a break to today;” “You-you’re the one -” why, I bet you (heh) can make a whole career in advertising and pop music out of that word…)

And then Clinton’s name is mentioned, personalizing, embodying, and exemplifying the existential alarm triggered by “you don’t want.” Norquist doesn’t bother going into detail about what “all the powers you don’t want Hillary Clinton to have” could be. Why should he? After all, it’s patently obvious that he and his audience want Clinton to have no power at all. Nor is it necessary to go into any kind of detail about what’s the big deal if Clinton has “all the powers.” If someone even dares to ask such a question in an atmosphere so rhetorically slanted, it could easily be sloughed off with a snarky laugh and a snotty joke. For a long time in the MSM, Hillary Clinton has been thoroughly demonized past rational dispute; giving her, of all people, illegal wiretapping powers, is literally unthinkable.

But the personalization serves a much more specific set of purposes for Norquist than simply the present issue of deploring increased presidential power. It is, of course, a highly partisan statement. By implication through omission, Norquist tacitly endorses Bush’s desire to have all the powers. These are powers you don’t want Clinton to have but what about the present day or furture Republican president? Well, that’s easily deflected. It’s simply not the question. The question is what if these awesome powers fell into the hands of a Democrat and not just any Democrat but Hillary Clinton? (And let’s not forget that the Republicans, being the generous, giving souls that they are, have already nominated and selected Hillary Clinton as the Democratic Party’s nominee for president in 2008, saving Democrats an enormous amount of bother deciding for themselves who they want.)

Existential alarm, demonization, personalization, simplification. It’s all there compacted, compressed, and finely tuned in the Norquist quote (there’s more, but that’s enough for now). And that’s TeeVee, the prime candidate, el numero uno (say it in English!) for the defining dialect of US English. It transcends the country’s regions, subcultures, religions, ethnic groups, and class. And political persuasions. Need examples? Look at tv commercials. Need less trivial examples? Look at the evening news, inevitably leading off a story on how Medicare’s drug policy affects a specific family (personalization). Look at how the choices for action and thought are automatically simplified, for which demonization really helps – invade Iraq or you will condone the actions of a monstrous monster!! Further examples?

Nah, you get the idea. Let’s turn to what Feinstein said. She’s not speaking TeeVee or any other dialect. Hell, she’s not even speaking. She’s just talking: no brain is engaged. Hers isn’t the language of persuasion. Nor is it evasive. It’s just rambling, boring, dull, and extremely unpleasant. It’s mediocrity arrogantly worrying over a moral principle – three serious taboos for native TeeVee speakers. Like us.

Consider her immediate resort to a strangled, masturbatory use of personalization. The first word is “I” and she “thinks it’s dangerous.” Yeah, big deal, that’s her (solo, egotistical) opinion, but Norquist speaks for our opinions. Worse, Feinstein sets up an instantly arrogant opposition and a hierarchy – I am the expert, you’re not, I think it’s dangerous, and you’re wrong if you don’t. In contrast, Norquist works the empathy angle – you think Hillary is dangerous.

Feinstein’s use of the first person also admits doubt where Norquist strictly limits doubt in an important way. Only Feinstein thinks it’s dangerous, and let’s face it, that’s just her opinion. But Norquist addresses us, a lot of us, and that many people really can’t be wrong. And for us to be wrong, that wouldn’t feel good, would it? Norquist knows we’re right. Feinstein just knows that she’s right.

Now, look – if you dare, it’s horrible, horrible – at Feinstein’s incoherent use of alliteration. Just thinking about it makes me wince.

Folks, really. If you’re gonna use “president” and “precedent” in the same sentence, you really need to be aware of it. And y’gotta do it with intent. Feinstein is just plain tone deaf. And the effect is revolting. Muffing her chance for a little clever verbal pizzazz, “precedent” becomes just an annoying big word – three whole syllables! – we really gotta struggle to parse. It merely intimidates, harking back to the arrogant “I” from whence she began. And then she repeats it at the end and it’s still not even close to funny, interesting, or illuminating.

Feinstein’s profound indifference to what she is saying – not the meaning, but the actual words and phrases she uses to convey meaning – is everywhere apparent throughout the quote. Yes, indeed, Bush certainly is a bumbling fool whenever he speaks, but even he rarely approaches the transcendent idiocy of calling on Congress to “grapple” with “our policies on torture.”

For crissakes, “grapple”?? Who knew that the legislatures took not only a tortuous route to making our laws, but a torturous one, too? Grapple, shee-it, let’s just use the rack.

And unlike Norquist, who compresses all the evil of the world into one Clinton, Feinstein makes the spectacular mistake of listing all of America’s sins. What on earth wash she thinking??? Y’know, I’ve read a lot about torture, rendition, detainees, and wiretapping since 2000. And every time I start to do so, I have to fight the desire to avoid hearing anymore about this stuff. It’s not fun, it’s a duty, espeically if my taxes are funding it, but don’t think for a second I want to hear about it. No one does (well, except maybe Don Rumsfeld, he’s so weird it just may set his putter straight, as the saying goes).

So If you’re gonna bring all these truly awful things up in this context, where it’s a side issue to the main one – the usurpation of powers by a power-mad executive – you better do it in such a fashion that we want to endure hearing about it. Otherwise, you’ll lose your audience. But for Feinstein, my God, these horrors actually become “our” horrors. Meaning not ony her and the Congress’s, but worse, yours and mine – policies. Wha? Diane, these are Bush’s policies, don’t tell me they’re ours!! I feel guilty enought already just having to pay for him, dig? And I’ve spoken out against them, marched, petioned, etc etc, from day one!

One last thing, no reason to prolong the agony but I can’t resist pointing out this flatulent rhetorical impropriety. Admit it: didn’t you just want to fucking hurl when you read “lest?” Oh, my! No scones for me, Major, I’m off to play the Grand Pee-a-know!.

I’m sorry, one last, last thing, and this is it. “lest[!] Bush’s claimed right to set the policies, or his policies themselves.” What is this, the Marx Brothers crazy legal contract skit? Can we just skip the sanity clause and watch the stateroom scene again? Please?

The point should be obvious but let’s spell it out anyway. Nobody’s saying to imitate Norquist’s style. The guy’s crazy and obnoxious and his style – irrationally hostile and obsessively nasty down to the microlevel – reflects that. But dear friends, you gotta have some rhetorical style. And unfortunately, even top Democratic politicians like Feinstein simply don’t.

Look, we all know what Feinstein is trying to say, at least in part – “Bush is acting like a tinpot tyrannical dictator. for which the only precedent among American presidents is the disgraced and disgraceful Richard Nixon. And there is no reason for this president to set such an awful precedent for America’s future leaders.”

The thing is: that is what she has to say, only better. Because she’s goddamm right. But her rhetorical incompetence tells us we’re gonna learn nothing if we listen to her, and we’re not gonna have fun, either. One or the other, preferably both – that’s TeeVee. That’s not just Teen Spirit anymore, dear Mr. Cobain. That’s America.

[Update: Slightly revised after initial posting.]

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